Sunday, August 29, 2010

Far away from now

Won't you look down upon me, Jesus
You've got to help me make a stand
You've just got to see me through another day
My body's aching and my time is at hand
And I won't make it any other way

I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again
Funny, isn't it?  Looking back at all of the people that have crossed paths with us in our lifetimes, how many of them disappeared from our lives entirely, never to see them again? At the time we last were together, neither one of us knew that it was the last time.  The last time we would catch each others eyes,  the last time we would be sharing even a sliver of each other, a time, place and memory forever fixed, so final, finished, the closing chapter of a book too brief, a narrative so fleeting and it was gone before we could grieve.

A lover, an ex, a best friend, a parent, it doesn't really matter, does it?  Time closes all that we have been, whoever we were and whatever life we were living.  Relentless, dogged, unforgiving.

I went dancing last night.  My partner held me close and though the small dance floor was elbow to elbow and tush to tush, we stood alone, caught in an embrace that will live with us forever.  When will this one pass?  When will paths divert, our lives move on, or now, in these years, just end?

Who are you missing tonight?  A first friend, first love, first spouse, first wonderful taste of the sweetness that rained down from our first companion in intimacy?

I miss the girl on the dance floor last night.  Though just a few feet down a hallway, I miss the way she was with me last night, buoyed by tequila,  the loud music and crowded dance floor, we found a space and time where we stood alone, a forever moment to be remembered, then missed, one day far away from now.