Pink Brain, Blue Brain: How Small Difference Grow into Troublesome Gaps - and What We Can Do About It by Lise Eliot, Ph.D.

Stars: *****

Houghton Mifflin Harcourt (2009)
432 pages
Adult Nonfiction

Summary: From the best-selling author of What's Going On In There?, neuroscientist Lise Eliot shatters the myths about sex differences, arguing that few are truly innate and that the brains of boys and girls are shaped by how they spend their time. - from Thomas Allen & Sons. (Click link for longer description)

This was an AWESOME book. I am always interested in sociology and gender differences fits right in. I've read other books and articles on the subject but this one takes the cake. In fact this one shows why some of the other ones I read weren't scientifically accurate. Any book that makes scientific claims needs to back them up but when I was younger, I just assumed if someone wrote a nonfiction book, they knew what they were talking about. How I of course know better.

Lise explains many different studies to back up what she says and mentions when a study is smaller and therefore can not be taken as "gospel" but with further research, can be proven one way or the other. You can tell she's done her research and she knows what she's talking about.

The most popular argument of course is whether boys and girls really do like different types of toys or whether we condition them that way. Lise seems to settle it once and for all. Boys and Girls DO play differently and are attracted to different toys - in GENERAL. Of course there are exceptions (which explains the boy who LOVES his dolls and the girl who rolls in the mud. However that doesn't mean we shouldn't encourage our boys and girls to play with the toys they tend to shy away from. Children learn different skills from different types of toys. So girls tend to be more communicative because they play with dolls and stuffed animals and play house which requires communication. Boys tend to have better large motor skills because they run around and chase, play cars and blocks. You can read more about this in the article linked below in Links of Interest.

I especially liked that the book talks about gender differences in each stage of life from prenatal to adult although there is more on children as the older you get, the harder it is to see if someone was born with that difference or just learned it throughout their life.  The prenatal section was very interesting to me since I'm pregnant.

There were only two small things that I should mention about the book.

1. It's somewhat technical. It's not a book you can read with lots of distractions but it's interesting enough to read through the technical parts. There would be no way the book could be written less technical though without being less believable as being a book written by a knowledgeable writer.

2. You can't just read some and then go tell everyone what you learned without continuing to read. Many times Lise would explain something a study showed and then just when you think that explains everything, the next section explains what that studies results can't be taken as fact. For example in the prenatal section, baby rats are studied to show how a release of androgen (hormone) affects baby boys. In the next section titled "Boys are Not Rats" it is explained why this doesn't necessarily mean the same thing with human babies.

Overall this was a great book and one I intend to share with some people I know who would appreciate it although I'll be holding on to it myself after that.

Links of Interest: Globe & Mail Article: Why Boys Need Barbies and Girls Need Footballs, Lise Eliot (especially check out the FAQ),

Other Reviews: Pussreboots, 5 Minutes for Mom,

Buy Pink Brain, Blue Brain at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

C'mon Papa: Dispatches From a Dad in the Dark by Ryan Knighton

Stars: *****

Knopf Canada, a division of Random House (2010)
Nonfiction: Memoir/Biography/Parenting
272 pages

Summary: C'mon Papa is Ryan Knighton's heartbreaking and hilarious voyage through the first year of fatherhood. Becoming a father is a stressful, daunting rite of passage to be sure, but for a blind father, the fears are unimaginably heightened. Ryan will have to find novel ways to adapt to nearly every aspect of parenting: the most basic skills are nearly impossible to contemplate, let alone master. And how will Ryan get to know this pre-verbal bundle of coos and burps when he can't see her smile, or look into her eyes for hints of the person to come? - from Random House

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be blind AND a parent? Wonder no longer. Ryan Knighton tells us the good, the bad and the ugly in his most recent memoir. The book switches from educational, to humourous, to breath holding moments, to sympathy inducing.

I learned about blindness in general as well as parenting while blind. I already knew that blind people keep things in their house in a certain spot so they can maneuver around but it never occurred to me that a blind person could have a job. (I apologize to all blind people who work.)

I think this is a much needed memoir that more people should read. Most of us don't really know what it's like to live with a special need let alone how to be a parent with a special need. Ryan Knighton is the perfect author as well, he tells a great story.

However he does include just a few swear words.  I am turned off my swear words and could have done without them but there were only a few so it was easy to just ignore them and continue reading.

Links of Interest: Ryan Knighton, Ryan Knighton on Twitter,

Other Reviews: NONE YET

Buy C'mon Papa at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

Guest Review: Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua

While not intended to be a parenting manual, Yale Law School professor Amy Chua's memoir, focusing on her trials and travails of mothering, is sure to go down in infamy. Having generated a considerable amount of controversy, Chua's Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother details, and, in some cases, promotes, an extremely strict parenting style that she attributes to her Chinese cultural background.

The media storm that followed the memoir's publication provides ample fodder for a review itself. But instead of analyzing what others have said about the book, I decided to crack it open myself to see what all the fuss is about. Of course, many of Chua's parenting dictates--not allowing children to attend sleepovers, participate in extra-curricular activities of their own choosing, and accepting nothing short of a straight-A report card--can be considered a form of child abuse. However, Chua is not quite the "Tiger Mother" the media have made her out to be, and the memoir has its moments of poignancy that extends beyond the extremist parenting.

The book traces Chua's relationship with her two daughters and husband Jed, an academic whose American-Jewish background views parenting in a much more benevolent, laissez-faire way. Some of the more alarming anecdotes, like when Chua dismisses her daughter's homemade birthday card as not good enough, or when she forces her child to play a tricky piano piece over and over, threatening her in the process, until she gets it right, may turn off many readers. But at the end of the day, Chua demonstrates a sense of humor that softens her fierce competitiveness. That her children seem to have turned out to be "normal", happy teenagers indicates that the accusations of child abuse among Chua's detractors are a little overblown.

While I would never actually employ the style of parenting that Chua seems to advocate, the professor and mother makes an interesting case against what she calls "Western" parenting. The heavy emphasis on self-esteem at all costs may indeed produce children who are satisfied with mediocrity and who begin to feel entitled to everything when they are older. Still, in my opinion, parents can strive for a happy medium. After all, teaching children that they must work very hard for success and recognition is a lesson that should, by all accounts, be instilled early.

Although Chua's memoir is by no means perfect, it is an interesting account of alternative parenting styles. What's more, any parent will be able to empathize with its basic themes of family, no matter how much they disagree with how Chua approaches raising children. Despite its imperfections, Chua's book is a worthwhile read for parents who struggle with anxiety over their child-rearing decisions. For more information, check out this excerpt, published in the New York Times.

By-line:
This guest post is contributed by Alisa Gilbert, who writes on the topics of bachelors degree.  She welcomes your comments at her email Id: alisagilbert599@gmail.com. 

Your Baby is Speaking to You by Dr. Kevin Nugent

Subtitle: A visual guide to the amazing behaviors of your newborn and growing baby.

Stars: *****

Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company 2011
Nonfiction, Parenting, Childcare
128 pages

Summary: Your Baby Is Speaking to You illustrates the full range of behaviors--early smiling to startling, feeding to sleeping, listening to your voice and recognizing your face. The newest research--including information on subtle and fleeting behaviors not seen or explained in any other book--illuminates the meaning of the things babies do that concern and delight new parents.

I was happy to review this book being that I'm pregnant with my third child. I basically already knew most of it as I read a LOT with my first child but I was reminded about a few things. Also although I have read about baby communication, it was all within large nonfiction books full of other information. Not every new parent is as obsessed with information as I am. This is a much better way to teach new parents about baby communication without overwhelming them with 300 pages of small text.

The book includes professional photography by Abelardo Morell. We're talking about eye catching, captivating baby shots. I'd buy a coffee table book just full of photos by Morell. Each open spread includes the text on the left side and a photo on the right. Each section is very small and cuts right to the point. I read the whole book in one hour. If you bring a book to the hospital with you when you give birth, this one would be perfect as it can be read in short little parts whenever you have a few minutes. 

Topics Covered: (all baby communication regarding:)

 - Types of Sleep
 - Types of Crying (full cry vs fussing)
 - Eating (Search response and feeding)
 - Newborn Reflexes
 - Baby's Senses (including the difference between cuddly and not so cuddly babies)
 - Settling In (startles, drowsiness, over-stimulation, signs of distress, sooth-ability, not easily settled baby)
 - Social Newborn (Looking into eyes, feeding and communication, power of your voice, imitation, learning, temperament and social smile.)
 - Growing Baby (Reaching Out, Exploring, Empathy, Learning to Love)
 - Parent/Baby and Lifelong bond

It's a great book for parents to be, either new or seasoned, especially if its been a while.

Links of Interest: You Tube Book Trailer,

Other Reviews: Escape in a Book, Becky's Book Reviews, This Mom Loves, Dog Ear Diary,

Buy Your Baby is Speaking To You at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

Speed Reviews - Adult Nonfiction

I have a bunch of books that just never got reviewed and I want to start fresh ASAP and review books within a week or two of reading it at the most. So I need to catch up on these reviews. Considering I read these over a year ago, I may not remember enough for a full review anyways.

Confessions of a Bad Mother by Stephanie Calman
Stars: *****

Summary: Do you feel that other mothers are "doing it properly" while you're getting it All Wrong? Do you give your children chicken nuggets for supper, herd them into bed and slump down exhausted for a drink? Do you wish there could just, please, be a little less pressure? If you try your best but frequently feel like a failure, if you - or your children - are in any way imperfect, then join the club: the Bad Mothers Club. Stephanie Calman has broken every rule and done it all "wrong". From giving birth with her pants on to making her kids watch more telly, she has persistently defied all accepted wisdom and professional advice.

This book is funny and a great stress relief read for moms who are worried they aren't good enough. Very humourous and the accompanying website is a great resource: http://www.badmothersclub.co.uk In fact the author has a new book: How (Not) to Murder Your Husband.

However if you are very adamant that how you parent is the ONLY right way, don't read this book.

Buy Confessions of a Bad Mother at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12 by Thomas W. Phelan, Ph.D.
Stars: *****

Summary: With humor, keen insight and proven experience, Dr. Phelan breaks down the task of parenting into three straightforward jobs: Job 1: Controlling Obnoxious Behavior, Job 2: Encouraging Good Behavior, Job 3: Strengthening Your Relationships

I'm not exactly still putting these ideas into practice but they are great ideas. If I wasn't busy reading other parenting books I'd read these one a few times over and fully put it into practice. As with self-help books, most parenting books do no good unless you put them into practice.

The book contains example narrations to show you how to use their advice. There are 1-2-3 Magic books for various topics and they have sold a lot. This book is the Winner of the National Parenting Publication Gold Award and a new, 4th edition has come out since I read this one.

Buy 1-2-3 Magic at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

Educating Esme: Diary of a Teacher's First Year by Esme Raji Codell
Stars: ****

Summary: Just as it says, a diary of a teacher's first year. She teaches fifth grade and has all kinds of creative ways to teach. She also includes 25 tips for teachers and teachers-to-be.

I remember liking this book a lot. I wanted to be a teacher at one point and so I've always liked reading teacher memoirs. I love when teachers have creative ideas. If you look at the reviews on amazon, they are quite split between 4-5 stars and 1-2 stars. The ones who disliked the books talk about the author being stuck up, focusing on how awesome she is or being obnoxious but I didn't get that feeling at all.

Buy Educating Esme at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

*All books were received in exchange for a review if I finished them. All opinions are honest and are my own. 

The Triumphant Child: Caring for your newborn Edited by Dr. Olson Huff and Nicole Rawson-Huff

Stars: *****

Sixty Second Parent (2009)
Adult Nonfiction
315 pages

Summary: Whether this is your first or your fourth baby, life with a newborn is an exciting yet challenging experience. Dr. Olson Huff and Nicole Rawson-Huff have joined with a team of leading pediatric specialists to provide everything you'll need to prepare and support you and your family as you make the huge leap from pregnancy to parenting. - from amazon.com

This is a great book for a first time mom who wants to know everything and anything about raising their child for the first 2 months.

It covers EVERYTHING:
First few days, newborn skin/reflexes/senses, temperament, milestones, comunication, bathing, circumcision, cord care, cradle cap, diapering, fontanelle (soft spot), nail care, finding a doctor, fever, baby's first visit to doctor, immunizations, breastfeeding, formula feeding, burping, reflux, elimination, crying, sleeping, swaddling, massage, bonding, taking care of mom, support, relationships (with spouse and other children), safety, car seats, sun/winter safety, multiples, premature babies, adopting, child care, fathers and more.

I'm pregnant with my third child now so I didn't read anything I didn't already know but then I'm a big reader. I could see this book being good even if it isn't your first child, especially if it's been a while. You may have forgotten things but also, parenting advice changes.

The book is easy to read and very easy to find a section if you are looking for information on something specific. The book is full of tips as well.

Links of Interest: The Triumphant Child, The Sixty Second Parent,

Other Reviews: NONE YET

Buy The Triumphant Child: Caring for your newborn at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

The No-Cry Separation Anxiety Solution by Elizabeth Pantley + giveaway

Stars: *****

Summary: A guide to help parents whose children are exhibiting signs of separation anxiety. No matter what your situation (school, daycare, clingy just when you leave the room for one second), Elizabeth Pantley can help you all. The book comes with a little magic bracelet and instructions for use.

I love the no-cry books. I've read The No-Cry Sleep Solution and The No-Cry Nap Solution.

First we are introduced to separation anxiety and it's basics. Then we are given tips for babies and toddlers. Then we meet the Magic Bracelet idea. Full instructions with different ideas for use are included. A magic bracelet is included with the book but you can choose to make your own or buy your own.

Following that is specific tips for preschool and school age children. The section after than addresses certain separation anxiety issues such as babysitters, daycare, going to work, starting school, new baby, going to bed alone, playdates and parties, overnights, travel, military duty, divorce, business travel and siblings going to school. Finally parent separation anxiety is addressed and there is a short chapter on Separation Anxiety Disorder.

The magic bracelet is a great idea. It's for your child to keep you close when they are away. She suggests having two identical bracelets so that if one is lost, there is a second one. The included bracelet is a simple orange woven bracelet with the word "Magic" on it and velcro clasp.

My kids cry sometimes when I leave but it doesn't last long and they don't have too many problems. However my eldest is starting school this September so I will try the bracelet with her.

Links of Interest: Elizabeth Pantley, Excerpt 1 and Excerpt 2,

Other Reviews: NONE YET

Buy The No-Cry Separation Anxiety Solution at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

GIVEAWAY CLOSED

Life is Too Short...

Lisa Quinn has a new book titled "Life's Too Short to Fold Fitted Sheets: Your Ultimate Guide To Domestic Liberation". I've not read it yet but it looks just like the kind of book I'd like!

What else do I think life is too short for?

Domestic/Parenting

• Trying to keep your house spotless when your children are young.
• Comparing your children to other people's children
• Thank you cards - email or when you get the gift is sufficient

Not-Domestic

• To worry about what everyone else thinks of you. 
• By the same token, trying to please everyone.
• Spending time being angry at things you cannot change.

This post is an entry into a book giveaway at TwitterMoms.

About "The No-Cry Separation Anxiety Solution" - the Newest Book by Elizabeth Pantley

Does it break your heart to leave your crying child at daycare, school, or with a babysitter? Do you worry and wonder how to help and what to do? Nearly all children experience separation anxiety - it's natural - but finding a solution can be difficult. Best-selling parenting author and mother of four, Elizabeth Pantley tackles this sensitive problem with her trademark gentle and respectful ideas.

Using the help of her army of Test Parents, Pantley has created a book filled with solutions. Whether your child is a baby, toddler or first grader, these tried and true techniques will help them to:

* Say goodbye at the door with a smile and a wave and no more tears.
* Conquer anxiety at daycare, school, parties, events and play-dates.
* Go to sleep peacefully - and stay in bed at naptime and bedtime.
* Feel comfortable with caregivers, babysitters, visitors, and other new people.
* Explore new places with joy and confidence.

Best of all, this step-by-step book INCLUDES A FREE MAGIC BRACELET that will help your child feel "magically" safe and secure whenever you're apart. It's just one of the many No-Cry solutions that will help you say goodbye to the stress of saying goodbye-and hello to a stronger, happier child.

You can find out more about this book and others at No Cry Solution

Do you have a Super-Glue Baby? Here's a video with author Elizabeth Pantley about the subject. (You can find more.videos on YouTube)

Temperament Tools: Working with Your Child's Inborn Traits by Helen Neville and Diane Clark Johnson

Stars: ***1/2

Summary: Research shows that many challenging behaviours are connected to a child's inborn temperament. When you understand what makes your child tick, you can adapt your parenting style to the individual needs of your son or daughter. Temperament Tools describes many types of children and offers you strategies to help life go more smoothly.

I picked this book up on my own at the library to try and understand my children better. It has you rate your child on a scale for eight different traits: Activity, Adaptability, Approach to New Things, Frustration Reaction, Intensity, Mood, Regularity and Sensitivity.

After rating your child and rating yourself (to compare) the book offers lots of tips and hints. The relationship between where you rate and where your child rates will determine some of your difficulties with your children. For example I always thought that since I'm highly emotional I'd understand my emotional child more and be sympathetic That's not how it is though. When one of us gets frustrated or upset the other gets annoyed and frustrated as well because we pick up on each other's emotions so we get frustrated with each other because they're being upset is making us upset.

After seeing how you and your child rate you can look at the traits your child is highest or lowest in and figure out what temperament your child fits in to. Some children are harder to place than others. The book labels each temperament as an animal, such as Tarita Turtle, Walocka Whale, BeiLing Bluebird and more. My younger child is a Tiganda Tiger for sure but my elder child only sort of fits into the BeiLing Bluebird. It all depends on how much they are at the extremes (high or low) for each trait.

The book was helpful in that I saw how similar or dissimilar my children are with me when it comes to certain traits and I was reminded that I need to keep my cool with my children because they aren't trying to annoy me on purpose, they're just being themselves. This book isn't the be all and end all of figuring out your child's temperament and how to work with it but it's a start.

Links of Interest: Temperament Tools Website,

Other Reviews: NONE YET

Buy Temperament Tools at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

The NDD Book by William Sears, MD

Subtitle: How Nutrition Deficit Disorder Affects Your Child's Learning, Behaviour, and Health, and What You Can Do About It - Without Drugs

Stars: *****

Summary: In The NDD Book, Dr. Sears presents the latest scientific research on the effects of nutrition on the brain, outlines the symptoms of NDD, and lays out a drug-free prescription for prevention and treatment. Filled with inspiring success stories of children from Dr. Sears's own practice who showed major improvements in learning, mood, and behaviour with diet changes alone, the NDD Book also provides nine days of sample meal plans and kid-friendly NDD-prevention recipes for meals, snacks and desserts.

First of all I'd like to clarify that NDD isn't a condition you can get an actual diagnosis for (except by Dr. Sears) and you won't find information on it in medical journals.

"Children are getting sicker, sadder, and fatter. Why? The problem is food, glorious food! During my thirty-six years as a pediatrician, I have never seen such an epidemic of nutrition related illnesses. In this book you will learn a new name that I have given to this epidemic: NDD, which stands for Nutrition Deficit Disorder." - from the introduction by Dr. Bill

This is not to say that he doesn't know what he's talking about. Everything he said makes perfect sense. He explains how poor nutrition can lead to the D's.

"The D Epidemic
Parents, we have an epidemic of Ds: attention deficit disorder (ADD), obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), autism spectrum disorder (ASD), Bipolar disorder (BPD), oppositional defiant disorder (ODD), depression and the biggest D of the decade, diabetes." - pg 7

First I'd like to point out that he doesn't say that poor nutrition is necessarily the cause for every person who has these diseases but it can cause it in some and make it worse in others. I do think he could clarify that a bit more though.

Second, I'm not sure why he put BPD as the short form for Bipolar Disorder as BPD is the short form for Borderline Personality Disorder and bipolar is usually short-formed to BP. This could be a little confusing.

I really enjoyed the book and will be putting some of what it says into practice. Food is put into Green, Yellow and Red light foods to help children and parents remember what's healthy. Also he uses the term Grow-Foods instead of Healthy Foods because the word healthy puts off children and adults who might otherwise eat said food. Dr. Sears also shares tips for helping your family transition to a better diet, ways to sneak in some vegetables while he develops a liking for them and games to do with your children to help them learn the difference between grow-foods and red-light foods and how they affect his body.

There is also a much needed chapter on breakfasts. Everyone has heard that you need a good breakfast to function but Dr. Sears actually explains how those foods work in your body to help your brain function.

I highly recommend this book to all parents and it could even benefit adults who don't have children, especially young adults because they are often not much better when it comes to eating nutritiously.

* I received a copy of this book for review from Hachette Book Group. Reviews are in no way affected by how I came across the book.

Links of Interest: Article on NDD by Dr. Sears, Ask Dr. Sears,


Other Reviews: NONE YET


Buy The NDD Book from amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

Review Catching Up (Various)

Julia's Kitchen Wisdom by Julia Child
Subtitle: Essential Techniques and Recipes From a Lifetime of Cooking

Stars: ****

This little volume is a small book of cooking wisdom from none other than Julia Child which was released in honour of the Julie & Julia movie with Meryl Streep and Amy Adams that came out. Although I like cooking, I'm still learning and I don't know the fancy names of most techniques or the specific way to do them. This book is different from your usual cookbook because it's less about recipes and more about technique, although there ARE some recipes.

Contents are as follows: Soups and Two Mother Sauces, Salads and their Dressings, Vegetables, Meats/Poultry/fish, Egg Cookery, Breads/Crepes/Tarts, Cakes and Cookies and Kitchen Equipment and Definitions. Here is a very SMALL list of things you'll learn: Using Simmered Mushroom Caps as garnish, Cooking with Wine, How to properly dredge, How to tell when homemade bread is done, and much, much more. My only real complain is lack of photos. There were some times I would have liked picture demonstrations but for the most part, I suppose you can get by without photographs. I especially like the last chapter which explains the difference between baste, beat, blanch, fold, mince, puree, saute, toss and more.

You can find a MUCH better review of this book at Books I Done Read. Thanks to Random House for the book.

Buy Julia's Kitchen Wisdom at Amazon.com

Dear Jo: The story of losing Leah ... and searching for hope by Christina Kilbourne

Stars: *****

Summary: Maxine and her best friend Leah used to have so much fun chatting with boys online. So what if Max and Leah lied about their ages and where they lived? But when Leah disappeared, Max realized they weren't the only ones telling lies online. Through her daily journal entries, Max shares the crushing loss of Leah and her desperate efforts to move on after all that has happened.

This was an AWESOME book but also heart-wrenching. This particular story isn't true but unfortunately, kids and teens being abducted by someone they met online IS true. Sharing this story with your preteen or teen may scare them but it will hopefully scare them from sharing personal information online.

The story is believeable and includes everything that a person in this situation would go through. The before part, right after the incident, finding out bad news, going to counselling, doing bad in school because you're depressed, working with the police, working things out in your mind and coming to terms with what happened, healing and moving on.

Other Reviews: Semicolon
Thanks to Lobster Press for the book!

Buy Dear Jo at Amazon.com


Psychos, Players, Punks and Pervs: How to Become the Ultimate Guy Detector by C. Dean Hall, M.S.

Stars: ****

At first look this book seems like a book for rape prevention but it is intended as more than that. Here's a quote from the publisher:

"Our research proves doctors, therapists, teachers and parents all agree that it [the book] stands apart because of its uncanny ability to engage, inform and protect girls regardless of their age or level of maturity. Our hope in publishing this book is that we may have played a small part in helping you, and the girls you love, to safely lead happy, healthy lives."

You can take a look at the Table of Contents and download some sample pages at The Guy Detector (the website for the book.) It is intended for teens to collage age but I would recommend 18 and under. I showed it to my 20 something friend who is dating and she said it was young for her. The book is more for those who haven't dated yet or haven't dated much or seriously. It has some good points although I can't say I necessarily learned anything but then I'm not the target age and I'm married so it's not like I'm dating either. I do plan on sharing it with my daughter's when they're older though.

For the sections on psychos, players, punks and pervs shows you how to spot one (e.g. Players view every female as a potential score and identify women who are insecure and need to feel loved, attractive or important.) You'll also find a story about a girl who got caught up with that type of guy (doesn't say whether it's a true story or not) and finally some advice on how to get away from that guy. The only problem with the book is it's hard to find. Amazon.com has it, Barnes and Noble and Chapters do not. You can buy it online from The Guy Detector website too.

Thanks to Inner Vista Press for a copy of this book.

Buy Psychos, Players, Punks and Pervs at Amazon.com

Backtalk: 4 Steps to Ending Rude Behavior In Your Kids by Audrey Ricker, Ph.D and Carolyn Crowder Ph.D.

Stars: ****

This is a short, (under 200 pages,) book to help you end backtalk from your kids from preschoolers to teens. I have a back talker so I was interested in reading this book. (Fireside (S&S) 1998) It has some good points which I've implemented (when I'm not already too frustrated to do them hehe) and it's helped. I can't say it works 100% mainly because I am not doing the 4 steps all the time, properly. That's the problem with any behaviour system book... it requires you to do each and every step in order, properly or it doesn't work. This sounds easy before you have kids but once they're here, you realize it's not that simple. It does have some good points though and also includes how to deal with your children's friends who backtalk.

Buy Backtalk at Amazon.com

Your Family Constitution by Scott Gale

Stars: ****

Subtitle: A Modern Approach to Family Values and Household Structure

Summary: Your Family Constitution guides the reader through a personalized journey of introspection, visioning, household observation, prioritization, and ultimately the creation of manageable boundaries coupled with consistent rewards and consequences. The product of their labor is a Family Constitution, a clear and consistent set of rules customized to the needs and circumstances of their household.

I originally got this book through Bostick Communications but then signed up for a book tour through Pump Up Your Book Promotion. I'm not American and Canadians don't have a constitution but I knew the basics of what it meant and figured (correctly) that the information in the book would be useful to anyone, no matter where they live.

I've read books that include help on making chore charts or talks about family meetings but this is by far the best book on household structure I've seen. The front of the book says it's a step-by-step guide to:

"Reconnecting with your kids, anticipating and resolving common family issues, enhancing family communication and enjoying parenting to the fullest."

The author, Scott Gale starts by telling a story of his Black Sunday. It's basically when everything in his family his rock bottom and he realized something needed to change. He slowly came up with this idea of a family constitution and it came together. He tried it out, scrapped it and tried again and with his family's help eventually altered it to come up with what they have now. His family constitution is in the back of the book for inspiration and guidance. He explains why you can't just use his. It's not just about chores and rewards but also about house rules (for parents too), way to manage common problems (in the Gale household it's sharing TV and video games) and ways to keep the system working (such as monthly and yearly meetings and family input.)

The book is set up simply so that you can find the part you need if you are referring back to it and you're never unsure about what's being talked about. Also the book is littered with funny comics depicting situations being talked about. There are tons of the cartoons and they are pretty funny. I laughed out loud at a few of them. There are also a couple of hand-drawn cartoons of his family which are great too. The comics and cartoons make the book a bit light-hearted, even when it's tackling difficult issues.

The best part of the book is that he doesn't just tell you WHAT to do, he tells you how he did it, why he did it and what happened when he tried to put it into place. Not everything worked at first which is why he stresses working together to come up with your plan.

Tomorrow I'll share a guest post from the author. In the meantime, you can buy Your Family Constitution for your very own.

Anytime Playdate by Dade Hayes

Full title: Anytime Playdate: Inside the Preschool Entertainment Boom or How Television Became by Baby's Best Friend

Stars: *****

Summary: In this eye-opening book, the first to investigate the explosion of the multibillion-dollar preschool entertainment business and its effects on families, Dade Hayes -- an entertainment expert, author, and concerned father -- lifts the veil on the closely guarded process of marketing to the ultra-young and their parents. [...] Going behind the scenes to talk with executives, writers, and marketers who see the value of educational TV [...] On the other side, he brings in the voices of pediatricians and child psychologists who warn against [TV] [...] Along the way, Hayes narrates the fascinating evolution of Nickelodeon's bilingual preschool gamble, Ni Hao, Kai-lan, from an art student's Internet doodles to its final product: an educationally fortified, Dora-inflected, test audience-approved television show. It tells us why the raucous Dora the Explorer has usurped Blues Clues for preschool primacy, why the Brit hit In the Night Garden won't follow Teletubbies into American tot stardom, and why the comparatively quiet and wholesome Sesame Street has reigned for decades. [read full summary here]

I picked this up at the library in the new book section. I flipped through it and saw discussion of actual preschool shows that my children watch which really intrigued me. I loved how the book showed both sides of the babies/preschoolers and TV debate instead of just saying TV is bad.

The book used some words and phrases that I wasn't familiar with like "start-and-stop sonic rhythms" and "casio-synthesizer incidental music." I think there were a few parts where it would have been better if it was explained in simpler terms, but for the most part it was fine. there were also words that I did understand but some readers may not, depending on reading ability: "mimicry, verbatim, emphatic etc..."

I learned about how Dora came to be. Did you know she started out as a non-Latina raccoon? I didn't. It was very interesting to learn about the processes that shows go through from idea through to finished show. There is so much more to it than I ever thought. As stated in the summary, the book was written before Ni Hao, Kai-lan was created and follows it through all the steps, showing each in much detail. I specifically found the parts about how focus groups are held with preschoolers very intriguing. Pages 105-111 is all about focus groups for Ni Hao, Kai-lan.

Pages 78-79 talks about mimicry (the act of imitating closely.) Raise your hand if your child has said one of these sentences:

a) "Who do you ask when you don't know which way to go?" "MAP!"
b) "A clue! A clue!"
c) something similar from a tv show

Many parents worry that it's not good if their child is repeating word for word many things they hear on TV, as if they aren't thinking for themselves or something. However research suggests differently:

"...research that suggests that mimicry, known to be a fundamental development tool throughout the animal kingdom, plays an important part in unlocking toddlers' imaginative powers."

Think of other times your child uses mimicry:

"[Paul L.] Harris shows, they will adopt a "mommy" tone and tell their dolls to go to sleep, or even when playing with another small child, they adopt a "baby" voice and ask their friend if they can go to the bathroom. In other words, mimicry simply allows a child to manipulate the world during exploration, and the inherent ego centrism of the child will always allow them to shed a role easily."

Every time a TV show is mentioned, it's shown in italics which was helpful. There were references not only to Dora and Ni Hao Kai-lan but Blues Clues, Sesame Street, Super Why!, Curious Buddies, Go Diego Go, Wonder Pets, Mister Rogers' Neighborhood, Elmo's World, Yo Gabba Gabba, Baby Einstein and lots more.

I realize Anytime Playdate is not a book that everyone would be into but if you love nonfiction, have a child under 5 that watches television or are otherwise interested in the preschool entertainment boom, this is your book.

Here is a long interview with Dade Hayes regarding his book and the book's topic. I'll be honest, I didn't watch it. (45 minutes)

A Child's Journey Out of Autism by Leeann Whiffen

Subtitle: One Family's Story of Living in Hope and Finding a Cure

Stars: *****

Summary: When Clay Whiffen was diagnosed on the autism spectrum, his parents didn't know where to turn. They refused to believe that he could not be cured, and began to try every therapy they could afford - and many they couldn't.
Frantically they worked, knowing that Clay slipped further away every day. When intensive medical testing revealed that Clay no longer fit the criteria for any condition on the autism spectrum, the Whiffens' wildest dreams were realized. Clay had conquered autism.

*Skip this next paragraph if you don't care about my personal interest in autism*
I have been interested in autism since I was a young teen even though no one I know personally is autistic. I don't know what it is but I've always been intrigued by it. I've done personal research on it and I love to read books on it. Perhaps some day I'll work with autistic children. Most of the books on autism I've read were before this blog but perhaps someday I'll reread them and then I can review them.

A Child's Journey Out of Autism is different than the rest because the child's (Clay) autism diagnosis was REVOKED! That's right, he was cured of his autism.

I won't lie, this book was very hard to read, most of the time. I got right into it, felt like a part of the family, felt like it was my little brother who was going through all this. Leeann's writing style just pulls you right in. Many times throughout the book I had to put it down and read something else before I started crying hysterically. I am a very emotional person but if you are at all like me, you'll have the same trouble. Even if you aren't overly emotional, you'll still feel empathy for the Whiffens.

The book actually doesn't read like a memoir. It's fast-paced and suspenseful. I couldn't read it fast enough, I wanted to know what was going to happen next. Would a treatment work, would he fall back into his prior behaviours?

The Whiffens tried almost every treatment designed for autistic kids from ABA to biomedical treatments (medicines and vitamins) to RDI to a Gluten/Casein free diet, as well as CARD and services from a local place for kids with disabilities. If you don't know what these terms mean, you will you read the book. It's all explained very well as you listen to the experts explain it to Leeann and Sean (the husband.) Especially when it comes to ABA, I've never read a better story that helped explain how ABA really works. Not a scientific explanation but a real down to earth, this is how it is one.

The basic thing is that this book provides hope. Hope that children with autism can be helped and hope that even if these children can't be totally cured like Clay, they can get better.

Links of Interest: Leeann Whiffen's website. (Be sure to check out the very moving book trailer on the main page, narrated by Clay Whiffen himself.), Leeann Whiffen's Blog, Clay's Law Video, Interview with Leeann Whiffen (from Maw Books),



Other Reviews: Maw Books,

Buy A Child's Journey Out of Autism at amazon.com and support SMS Book Reviews

The No-Cry Nap Solution by Elizabeth Pantley

Stars: *****

I was lucky enough to be sent this book for review direct from the author. I was honoured! Be sure to check back March 2/09 for a giveaway!

Summary: The No-Cry Nap Solution offers you a proven formula to ensure that your baby, toddler, or preschooler gets daily restorative rest. You'll learn gentle, loving, tear-free techniques, developed by world-renowned parenting expert Elizbeth Pantley and tested by hundreds of families around the world, guaranteed to help you: convince any child to nap every day, effortlessly settle your child for naptime in his or her own bed, turn short and fitful naps into long and peaceful ones, establish a nap schedule that works for you and your child and confidently deal with sudden changes, nap strikes and travel.

I've read her No-Cry Sleep Solution book (the one for babies) and I found it helpful. Both books have forms you can fill out to assess where your child is at in her sleeping. How can you fix it if you don't know what needs fixing right? Then after you assess your child's sleep patterns, you can figure out which issues need fixing and go the appropriate chapter. Since all families and children are different, there are tons of suggestions and you can pick which ones work for you and your children and try them.

The most important thing is that Elizbeth Pantley NEVER tells you that you MUST do something.

"This book is about solving those problems that you feel are problems. Just because there is a chapter about how to help your baby stop napping in your arms, doesn't meant that napping in your arms is an evil sin to be banished and you must stop now no matter what - it means that if having your baby nap in your arms is a problem for you, then I will provide you with ideas that will help you make a change." - pg 21

I think this is a very important point and one that all parenting books should follow. Even if we choose to read an advice book, doens't mean we want to be told what to do all the time. We just want suggestions.

The book is divided into parts and chapters as follows:

Part 1 - Nap Magic (chapters about basic nap facts and sleep and help with creating sleep loves and nap plans.)

Part 2 - Newborn Babies (chapters just for newborns)

Part 3 - Solving Napping Problems (making short naps longer, nap resisters, changing form two naps to one nap, is it time to give up naps?, in-arms sleep to in-bed sleep, falling asleep without breast, bottle or pacifier, motion sleep (like swings) to stationary sleep, going "Back to Sleep", swaddling, car naps to bed naps, colic and naps, special situations (such as multiples or special needs) and sleep disorders)

In the chapter about deciding if it's time to give up naps, Pantley explains that since naps are good for all ages, even adults, you might want to start a Hush Hour. This is also good for kids who really refuse a nap. Even just not hearing the word nap can help. Hush Hours are basically quite times (about an hour) where everyone is either lying quietly in the dark or at least doing quiet activities. As a Spark leader (part of Girl Guides of Canada, for ages 5-6) whenever we had a camp or sleepover we had rest time after lunch. The girls were mostly too old for naps but without that rest time, the kids were cranky and tired. Even though they didn't actually SLEEP during the rest time, they were refreshed and ready for more fun after the rest period. So I highly recommend Hush Hours.

I must say that a lot of the information in this book is similar to The No-Cry Sleep Solution but that's because you do a lot of things the same for night sleep and naps. However there are some differences so I see why it was made into it's own book.

Although this book is for toddlers and preschoolers too, most of the information was for babies but then they're usually the hardest ones to get to sleep right? Now I'm probably jinxing myself here but my kids don't have too many problems with taking their naps, even night time sleep isn't bad (although it was in the past) so I didn't need to use the suggestions but the one I do need is the one where we keep a better schedule and nap at the same time everyday and wake up and go to sleep at the same time everyday.

At Elizbeth Pantley's website you can find out all about her books, some advice, links, photographs and more. You'll also find printable copies of the logs and plans in the book. You can read excerpts of this book here.

Buy The No-Cry Nap Solution: Guaranteed Gentle Ways to Solve All Your Naptime Problems (Pantley) from Amazon.com

Just Tell Me What To Say by Betsy Brown Braun

Stars: *****

I received this book for review from HarperCollins way back when but never got around to it. Now I wish I had!

Summary: What to say when your 2-6 year old doesn't listen, throws tantrums, is a picky eater, misbehaves at the table, worries about bad things happening, fights with siblings, whines, talks back, swears, uses potty talk, burps, farts, picks his nose, needs to be told about illness, divorce or death, asks about sex and more.

The summary I put above is what it says on the FRONT of the book which is unusual. This book was released March 2008 and it was an ARC copy that I have.

This. Book. Was. Awesome. Those four words could be the review right there. I've read lots of parenting books and I've seen some specialize in toddlers, some in preschoolers and some in elementary kids but none for ages 2-6. The book made me understand what is so similar about those ages. Before 2 a child doesn't understand much and explanations are not needed. After 6 they understand a LOT more so it's often easier to explain things. In between your dealing with a child with limited understanding but who wants to know about everything. They are also very self-centric, worried about how things affect them.

The book is separated into chapters subtitled: Communicating With Your Children, Discipline Dos and Don'ts, Sibling Issues, Children's Eating Habits and Behaviors, Dealing with Boogers, Burps, Farts - Manners and Social Graces, Day-to-Day Parenting Dilemmas, Learning about the Birds and the Bees, Talking about Serious Illness, Learning About Death, Talking with Your Children about Divorce, and Answering Questions about Natural Disasters, Terrorism and War.

Those last five chapters were the ones that I thought were the best. They're the topics we are most afraid to talk about. Speaking of Sex and More Speaking of Sex by Meg Hickling are awesome books for talking to all kids about sex but Betsy Brown Braun does an awesome job of telling you exactly what to say to your 2-6 year old. That's what this book is all about, giving you the actual words you can say to your children. I've not seen much about talking about serious illness, death or divorce with your children except probably in books made especially about those subjects. I've never seen a book about talking to your kids about Natural Disasters, Terrorism and War. In fact I was wondering to myself why you would need to talk about that at all. The scripts aren't for those with family members involved in war and such though. It's for the rest of us. Kids who perhaps accidentally saw a feature of it on the news.

Like I said, what also makes this book different is that it gives you specific scripts to say to your children. You may need to customize some of them of course but for the most part, they can be said as is.

Since this was an ARC, I can't quote the book so here is a rundown on the chapter on manners and social graces.... first there is a little introductory information, then some tips and scripts for encouraging your child's use of manners, then an info section on "Please, Thank You, Excuse Me, and Other Social Graces," and tips and scripts for eliciting please from your child, info on thank you, tips and scripts in the event of noncompliance, info on burps and farts, interrupting, greetings and farewells and kisses and hugs. Then tips and scripts for kisses and hugs, info on I'm Sorry, tips and scripts for I'm sorry, info on telephone manners, tips and scripts for the telephone, info on dealing with rudeness in public, tips and scripts for dealing with embarrassing exclamations from your child in public, info on boogers and nose picking, and tips and scripts for dealing with nose picking.

I HIGHLY recommend this book for parents with kids ages 2-6.