Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Saturn: Department of Defense, the Hexagon

A special explanation for those journalists whose mind is not powerful enough to determine the answer even though it is sufficient for them to revenge by attempted Goebbelsian character assassinations: this text is indeed a joke.

Enceladus, a moon of Saturn, should be frozen. Nevertheless, it seems to create its own heat. Also, Mars, Jupiter, Triton, and Pluto seem to be warming right now. As you know, warming is man-made. One of the small problems with the man-made global warming theory was that no evidence of humans and industry on these other planets and moons was known.



This problem has just been solved. The Cassini-Huygens mission has observed that the Republicans on Saturn have built their Department of Defense on Saturn's North pole: click the picture for more. Cars appear to be whipping around the Hexagon like on a racetrack. Twenty days ago, I saw the Pentagon in D.C. and I assure you that it looked exactly like the Hexagon on the picture except that one segment was missing.

While the Northern Hemisphere is controlled by the conservatives, the other hemisphere suffers: there is a hurricane with a giant eye on Saturn's South pole. Mars, on the other hand, is governed by Martian hippies.




Some contrarians propose an alternative explanation that hexagonal convection cells can occur in fluid dynamics. A problem with this explanation is that the consensus of climate models agrees that hexagons can't occur naturally. It's obvious to every concerned scientist that there must be intelligent design behind this remarkable structure: it is the same culprit who is responsible for the global warming on other celestial bodies. We will find them and they shall be punished. Amen.

Via David Goss.