Eleventh elderly rich white Republican enters race

The co-star of Curly Sue, the one who has Republicans everywhere wet with pleasure, is "testing the waters". His presidential campaign committee, "Friends of Fred Thompson" -- rhymes with 'soft' -- will raise money for him without his actually having to say he's running.

This news naturally has the hearts of Houston conservatives aflutter. Because there's nothing like an unemployed actor that screams "WHITE HOUSE" in their heads.

Let's briefly review the man's career:

2007: Warming up for his turn in the spotlight, Thompson puts on a hairpiece and portrays President Ulysses S. Grant for the HBO docu-drama Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee. During his one scene and ten seconds of screen time, he grumbles and smokes a cigar. Obviously a method actor.

Also this year: responding to Michael Moore's challenge to debate him on health care policy, Thompson has a YouTube filmed of him grumbling and chewing a cigar.

Is there a pattern here?

-- Too many years to bother counting: his portrayal of New York district attorney Arthur Branch spanned four different versions of the TV show "Law and Order".

His film roles would make a pretty good resume' for an aspiring politician, if they had not been film roles, of course: CIA director in No Way Out; a Senator (himself) in Albert Brooks' Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World; a major general in Fat Man and Little Boy and a rear admiral in The Hunt for Red October. He played Racehorse Haynes in the "special TV event" Bed of Lies and former AmEx chief and corporate sleaze Jim Robinson in HBO's Barbarians at the Gate (two roles also requiring precious little departure from his everyday life).

I'd say he's eminently qualified to be the GOP nominee. I really hope he can turn back the likes of Sam Brownback and Tom Tancredo, because compared to them he's positively liberal.