Friday, September 30, 2005

The first millikelvin

Sometimes next week or so, there will be worldwide celebrations of the first millikelvin that will be saved by the Kyoto protocol; see the Kyoto counter on the right side. This millikelvin is a source of immense pride for all the people who care about the global warming.

One negative millikelvin is the upper limit on the temperature difference that the world community has bought so far; this "huge" temperature difference is the highest estimate based on the assumption that CO2 really matters - which is what the "climate models" behind Kyoto assume. If the carbon dioxide matters less, then we have bought an even more negligible amount of negative temperature.

When you will talk to your granddaughter in 2030 and she will be looking at the global thermometer and it will show 16.443 degrees Celsius, you will proudly say the following:

  • Do you see the number 16.443, Hillary? This is a result of the worldwide efforts in 2005 in which I actively participated - efforts to cool down our blue planet. If we had not united most of the civilized world back in 2005 and if we had not paid 100 billion dollars in 2005 itself, the thermometer would probably be showing 16.444 degrees Celsius today. That would be a real disaster. Can you imagine, 16.444 instead of 16.443 on September 30th, 2030? You can see how much I loved you, even decades before you were born. And it was actually very easy: those hundreds of billions of dollars were mostly paid by the evil capitalists anyway. We used the most advanced technology available in 2005 - especially bureaucratic regulations designed to reduce the economic growth. And this progress continued. This is why you are a polar bear, Hillary, instead of a dirty human being. A happy polar bear who likes its country, namely the Icy Socialist Union of Equatorial Glaciers.

You may think that it is not nice to kick into a dead body - and Kyoto is dead even according to Tony Blair and Japan Today, much like newspapers in New Zealand, Scotland, D.C., China, and elsewhere. But such an incredible exercise in madness, using the words of Japan Today, probably deserves to be kicked into even after its death.

P.S.: Some people such as CIP have questioned whether I have actually seen the precise words of Tony Blair who recently declared that no Kyoto-like treaty can ever work and that Kyoto will never be repeated - and it should be replaced by efforts to improve science and technology faster, without any mandatory caps. Of course that I've seen it. You can read the full PDF file with their proceedings here or find Blair's Kyoto comments on page 14.